Are there any roadblocks you need to eliminate in order to really grow as a human being?
This is a question I’ve asked myself for a long time now.
Because I see so many people still living beneath their potential.
And the important thing is, they are NOT happy about it.
If they would be happy that would be fine, there wouldn’t be any real reason to do personal development.
But I notice the frustration and hopelessness of many because they just don’t know how to change.
So what makes the difference in people’s life when one person actively grows and another lives in quiet desperation?
What do we have to do to grow?
What is the first step?
I’ve personally identified three fundamental steps that can really jumpstart your personal development:
1. Acceptance of What is
Acceptance is one of those necessities. Because as long as you aren’t accepting the reality of your life, you are, unfortunately, living in denial.
You don’t see things clearly and you’re not in alignment with the truth. This makes it very hard to change. Firstly because you are not working on a right representation of reality and secondly because you rationalize.
You rationalize the situation as being better as it really is. This makes it harder to develop the necessary motivation to improve. It also makes it less likely to use the pain of the current situation as a driving force for change.
So telling yourself the truth, even if it’s making you feel uneasy, is a big step forward. It creates the awareness of a problem and you come out of ignorance, which is always the first thing to make something better.
2. Your Willingness to Change
In order to grow and improve your life you have to be willing to change for the better.
Without this willingness you can have the best advice, the best friends, coach, program, whatever… nothing will really help because deep down you are resisting. So saying “yes” to change is required.
And you know what will make it easy? It is to know that you are going for POSITIVE change. It will get better. It will feel better.
You will enjoy the end-result. As soon as you believe this, change becomes a positive thing. You will welcome change and look forward to actively changing yourself.
These two steps were actually a warm-up. I think the real first step of personal growth is to realize that…
3. You Are Responsible
You are responsible for everything that happens in your life. The current situation you are in is as it is because of the past decisions you made – or didn’t make.
Your life is your responsibility, nobody else can live it for you. The illusion that anyone else or anything else is responsible for the results you have in your life is the problem.
Of course, I know that there are events that will influence your life, which are not in your control. So what I said is a bit of an over-statement. But that’s not the point here.
The point is that taking full responsibility for your life is your move to power. You take control and power back to yourself and by doing so you know that nobody other than you is responsible for your happiness.
It has to sink in and then you are not looking to the outside world anymore for approval or direction. You will find that in yourself. And from this realization onward you will grow much faster. From my point of view, taking 100% responsibility is the first and most powerful step in personal development.
So with this 3 step process you have a very strong foundation to initiate positive change for yourself. I know it’s not that easy sometimes, but actively pursuing personal development will be incredible rewarding.
I learned for myself that the important thing is to always believe in your ability to create a bright future. In other words, to have a positive outlook on life.
And what could be better than working to improve yourself?
Because the best investment you could ever make is the investment in yourself.
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Written on 4/2/2012 by Myrko Thum. I write in detail about personal development and how to develop the personal qualities to live a successful and fulfilled life. You can get a Free 5 Day Introduction Course to Personal Development via my Newsletter.: “In my life I’ve been driven to answer one burning question: How can I get the most out of myself? You can read the essence of my search for this answer on my blog and newsletter.” | Photo Credit: Seier |
