Obtaining happiness doesn’t always have to be about gaining. When we think about things that would make us happy we usually find ourselves daydreaming about things we could add on to life: new house, beautiful car, a great lover, a fancy job, an amazing vacation, etc.
But what about the things that we could lose or let go of to find our happiness? Often times, it’s what we already have in our life that obstructs us from finding ultimate happiness. While complete happiness may be difficult to find, given that life always has a few ups and downs, being mostly satisfied (or content) with the way your life turned out can also be a blessing.
Here are few things you need to let go of in your life to pave your way through a happiness and success.
1) Pride:
Self-esteem is good, but pride is bad. An excess amount of pride will act as a negative force in your life, destroying you, your relationships, and maybe even hurting your success. A person with humility will always acknowledge the fact that he may be wrong and could have made a mistake. A person of pride, however, will never see it this way. Not being able to see or learn from your mistakes will always prevent you from seeking personal and professional improvement, thus hampering further success/betterment. Pride can also transform into “ego” and severely damage our relationships with the most important people.
2) Grudge:
Holding a grudge is like holding a ball of fire and choosing not to let it go. The act of forgiveness preached by monks, priests, and psychologists all over the world is not so that you let other shave peace, but actually so that you, yourself are at peace and free of pain.
3) Equating Money to Success:
Despite what the media promotes, more money does not mean “success”. It is an ill-conceived notion that “fame” and “fortune” would bring us happiness. In many cases, people who already have fame and fortune are the saddest souls on earth. How you define worldly success is up to you. However, keep in mind that it may bring you happiness for only a short period of time since human nature is fickle. Spiritual success, in contrast, if far more satisfying and everlasting.
4) Failures:
lamenting over past mistakes or failures will prevent you from moving forward in the present and preparing for the future. Failures are inevitable throughout life, and chances are, you are going to fail again—several times—while facing new challenges. The only reason why you should be thinking over your past failures is to observe what not to do in future.
5) You Ex’s:
An ex is an ex for a reason. Unless that reason was never justified and there is a possibility you could make amends, there is no reason to waste any more time thinking about your ex. Lingering feelings will prevent you ever moving on and being truly happy with someone else.
6) Everyone’s Approval:
Letting others dictate your life just might make others happy, but this usually happens at the cost of your own happiness. Making a few good decisions in your life that you don’t regret the least bit is far more fulfilling than making many decisions only to make others happy (and not yourself).
7) The Ideal:
Let the word go. There is no such thing as an “ideal” partner, the “ideal” family, the “ideal” person, or an “ideal” job. There is always a fault to find in everything natural and earthly. Learn to weigh your options, choose the best one, and accept whatever faults or flaws that remain.
8) Toxic People:
There are always two kinds of people: those that add to your life and those that subtract from it. You want to stick with the people who add or improve your life by satisfying emotional or physical (both tangible and intangible) needs. Toxic people are the ones who do more harm than good. These are the people who bring about feelings of stress, unhappiness, or hatred and complicate your life rather than simplify it. Choose not to spend any more time or energy with these people and whenever possible, cut them loose.
9) Judgments:
Letting go of your biases is one step towards accepting people the way are, and in doing so, filling your life with love, friends, and happiness. Biases and judgments root from negativity which is never good for internal well-being. Besides, why should we care what the other does or doesn’t do? It’s not our job to make judgments and determine how “good” or “bad” they are. Who are we to make judgments when we have never been in their shoes or fully know their side of the story? Even God, the ever-loving, is willing to forgive and excuse the worst of people—and very often it’s that hope that keeps us going.