How to Deal With an Elderly Parent Who Is Angry and Negative?

By calista Willows

January 10, 2024   •   Fact checked by Dumb Little Man

How to Deal With an Elderly Parent Who Is Angry and Negative?

Is your parents’ abrasive behavior driving you crazy? Do you feel embarrassed when you take your parents out, and they suddenly explode in anger? Has the disability of your parents made their behavior hostile? If you’re wondering why this is so, here’s a dedicated effort to shed light on why elderly citizens show a negative attitude towards their children.

Effective Ways to Deal with Unpleasant Personality Disorders and Disability of seniors

We have touched on several behavioral issues of older citizens along with remedies. Read on to discover why parents behave unusually and how their problems can be rectified.

What to Do If Parents Burst In Anger, That Too At Unnecessary Conditions?

The parents who used to be saviors in your childhood times are now the ones you don’t want to confront. And, no one wants to become a victim of an angry person’s frustrations, especially if they are your parents. The situation becomes quite unpleasant and painful. But before taking the situation personally, try to find out why your elders are on their worst behavior.

What to Do If Parents Burst In Anger, That Too At Unnecessary Conditions?
Photo: verywellhealth.com

Unarguably, aging is such a factor that intensifies the longstanding personality attributes in some unpleasant ways. Aging ignites resentment in elders because they are suffering from chronic pain, losing friends and memory, and encountering some of the worst phases of their life.

The safest approach to deal with angry parents is to let them be on their own for a while and take a break from caregiving. Find respite and disability home care, get some fresh air, and forget the negative experience you had with your parents.

Remember, elders normally behave casually in front of strangers, so you can take advantage of this fact and hire some in-home care.

Why Do Parents Behave Abusively and How to Deal with It?

Older people often lash out at the caregiver. If this situation remains unattended or unchecked, the aggravating behavior of the seniors becomes worse and can lead to uncontrollable abuse of the caretaker.

Think about a situation in which the caregiver is a family member; how badly it will affect the mental, physical, and emotional state of the person. If this sounds like you, don’t fret.

Why Do Parents Behave Abusively and How to Deal with It?
Photo: griswoldhomecare.com

Remember, to tackle any situation; you need to dig the root cause of it first. The ground of this abusive behavior is none other than NPD (Narcissistic Personality Disorder). It is a kind of mental disorder that forces adults to act like a child, especially in front of those who shows the most love and affection. Remember, they don’t do it intentionally or consciously. They just detrimentally vent their frustrations by lashing out.

If you are thinking about dealing with your parents’ abusive behavior, we are here to help you. Here’s how you can wrestle with the said situation.

Talk to them. Try to explain to them that this behavior hurts you. Make them realize the amount of time and energy you invest in taking care of them. Additionally, if your parents require your assistance in stepping out of the home, hand over the duty to disability employment support services. By removing yourself from the picture, you can make them realize your importance and the affection you show towards them. It seems a bit offensive, but going this far can help you renew your relationship with your parents. If the abuse is physical, these efforts will not affect it substantially. However, to combat this specific condition, you need to seek professional assistance.

You may make a call to APS (Adult Protective Services) or permanently entrust your loved ones to a professional caregiver, court-designated guardian, or long-term care facility.

What Is The Cause That Leads Parents To Use Offensive Language and Inappropriate Comments? Is This Disability Rectifiable?

If your parent(s) spouts profanities, inappropriate comments, and use offensive language, you must be perplexed as to why they do so. You must be thinking about why your mild-mannered parents have started insulting and cursing you. These situations become extremely embarrassing when this happens at public parties and events. And well, no matter where this happens, these situations are hurtful indeed!

The reason for such verbal outbursts stems from Alzheimer’s disease or dementia. Or sometimes, UTIs may also be the culprit if the outset is sudden. Urinary Tract Infections are common in seniors compared to youngers and often appear in the form of agitation.
If the reason is dementia, the case is nearly impossible to rectify. However, if your parent is just plain crass – good news! You can deal with rudeness and swearing by setting firm ground rules for them.

What Is The Cause That Leads Parents To Use Offensive Language and Inappropriate Comments?
Photo: theclassichg.com

You need to clarify that you won’t bear such offensive language, especially in public events. Put them in a hypothetical situation, saying that “Dad, how would you feel if you heard your grandchildren saying offensive terms?” Or “Mom, if Dad were here, wouldn’t he be appalled by the type of language you use?”

Believe us, a little bit of guilt will help them realize that their behavior is by no means justifiable and tolerable. If this doesn’t work, try another technique, “Distraction.”

Remember, older people love to enter the windows of the past to feel the winds of their good old days. The happy moments from the older times will eventually change the subject and alleviate their explosive attitude. They will forget what they were talking about. Their outburst will end once they get distracted. Indeed, this option serves as the best bet for parents who are a victim of dementia.

Howbeit, if none of the options works in your favor, just disappear for a little while, hire disability home care, and wait until the situation gets blown over.

 

Above All Else, Remember The Following!

➔ It’s not about winning an argument since it’s the battle against anger issues, not the person.

At the expense of losing your relationship, you won’t ever want to stand victorious.

➔ The key to a healthy relationship lies in forgiving and forgetting.

➔ When there is so much negativity around, focus on positive things.

This will add positivity to your life, and you will be less affected by your parent’s harsh attitude.

➔ Meditate and get involved in stress-relieving activities.

Your mind is the main culprit in igniting your emotions, so if you keep it calm. Your life will be calmer.

➔ Disability employment support services can help deal with the behavioral issues of your parents.

 

Takeaway

Without the shadow of a doubt, it is evident that curbing parents’ anger and hostile behavior requires an extreme level of patience. However, nothing is impossible in this world. If you embrace the tips mentioned above, we believe you will be able to foster a nurturing air between you and your parents.

Don’t let your parents fall prey to sheer anger, as it will jeopardize the mental and physical health of the caregiver. Remember, it is never too late to start from today!

calista Willows

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