How to Get a Girlfriend in High School: Guide for 2024
By Ruth Jesse
January 10, 2024 • Fact checked by Dumb Little Man
If you decide to go on a date with someone, you will first need a girlfriend. Whether you are in middle school or high school, your age during that time is young. There are plenty of changes going on in your life. You’re thinking about things that are changing your body, interests, feelings, and hobbies.
One thing that you more think about is now how to get a girlfriend in high school if you didn’t get one in middle school. Trust me, you’re not alone. Everyone at that age thinks about girls or getting a girlfriend. But dating is not as easy as you think.
All the major changes that are now coming into your life are a good thing. It’s the first step where a guy wants to get a girlfriend. He wants to enhance his social skills, and communication skills, make new friends, and find tips on how to get a girlfriend in high school.
It might frustrate for you to feel alone and without a girl. You will crave a relationship with a girl and that will motivate you further to seek good advice from someone who can nudge you in the right direction. Luckily, you are in the right spot. We will help you with how to get a girlfriend in high school.
Any relationship you want is hard. It’s confusing and complicated. Whether when you are young or when you are old. Dating to get a girlfriend requires skills. Passion, Patience, and dedication. A relationship will blossom if the partners are like that.
They talk, understand each other, are of the same age or with little difference. You want the relationship to last, right? Or do you want to just be friends? It’s overwhelming, I know. But we are not here to talk about the problem itself, we are here to solve it.
Anything is possible, so read it till the very end so you can understand the concept of dating and methods on how to get a girlfriend. Let’s dig in.
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Here’s a guide on how to Get a Girlfriend in High School
6 Ways To Broaden Your Social Group
There is no magic trick to getting a girlfriend in high school. You can’t just expect them to come to you and ask you out while you do nothing. It doesn’t work that way. Broaden your social circle and start meeting new people.
That way you can meet new girls too, which helps you find a girlfriend in high school. Talk with them, make a new friend, show that you are interested, etc. Be a person like that and you might find soon a friendly date.
Are you struggling with your social skills and can’t expand your social circle? Here are some nice tips for you that might help:
1. Social Media is your hope
You might not have an interest or find it difficult to indulge yourself in school activities. But maybe you love to blog, play games, or even comment on random videos on the internet. The internet is filled with all kinds of people and if you focus on what you want, you might get it.
So use social media to your advantage, and find mutual friends and good friends on the internet. Even guy friends on social media can help you find the right girl. You just have to expand your social circle.
The same goes for shy guys and introverts. If you’re the type of guy who is not interested in social gatherings, then using social media will help you. If you’re the type of guy who wants to meet girls online, then social media is your friend.
There are plenty of online communities from book readings, blogs, vlogs, gaming, and message boards where girls generally hang out. You can meet them there and, who knows, might find a girlfriend there too. But try to hang out with girls who live close to you because you might not be able to hang out in real life if they’re far away.
2. Be the talking one
Women and girls all want boyfriend material. Someone who has class, who can sustain a relationship, someone who shows respect and loves talking. Girls love to talk! They just love it. There is no explanation for it, but they just do.
If you talk with more people, the more chances you will have to get a girlfriend in high school. Girls will notice that and they will surely pay attention to you. The more you talk, the more friends you will make. And more girls you will meet. Thus helping you find the answer to how to get a girlfriend in high school.
Show interest in them when you talk and they will be interested in you too. Be funny, make them laugh, and keep a conversation going. When you’re talking, show class. Talk to the point and share your life with them. Girls are excellent listeners, as much as they are good talkers.
A quality girl will respect you for having a conversation with her. So, take a deep breath, muster up the courage, and start talking. This will help your social circle grow and open doors for you to find the girl that you need.
3. Join groups in school
If you’re wondering how to get a girlfriend in high school, then you must have joined no school clubs or groups yet. School clubs are an important part of your social life. They help you find new friends and enhance your skills as well.
Depending on what you like, join that club or group in your school. That way you can find girls who share the same likes as you. Whether it’s sports, drama, music, volunteers, or anything else. Joining it will benefit you to find the right girl.
There’s always a school event like a school dance or school play, which can motivate you to find a girlfriend. Think about it, you might meet someone from such groups and become friends. And steadily that friendship might turn into a relationship and what time will be best to ask her out? You got it.
At school events, a school dance or school play will surely make any girl fall for a guy who shares the same likes and interests as hers. So join those groups at school and start talking because that’s one way to find out how to get a girlfriend in high school. It’s brilliant advice!
4. Know your friends well
The first thing you should do before seeking a girlfriend or meeting girls is to know about your friends. What type of people do you hang out with? What type of friends do you have? Are they the bullying type? Lazy? Are they good people?
Will they make a good impression when your girlfriend will meet them? Are they disrespectful? Out of 100, only one girl might choose a bad boy over a good one. So know your friends well. Don’t make a friend who you are not proud of. But make a kind friend so when your girl meets him/her, she is comfortable.
No girls like guys who have insensitive and rude friend groups. In high school, you might meet all kinds of different people in life. Some might make you laugh and some might make you upset.
So choose wisely when you decide to broaden your social circle. Don’t hang out with the dangerous company and the right girl will come along in no time. These tips are something you should not forget because they will help you find that first date for you.
5. Go outside
A simple yet easy way to find and meet a nice girl is to go outside. Don’t just hang out around the high school. Be more social with people in your community. That way you can find and meet people who will welcome you into their own friend’s group. When you go outside and start socializing, you will take one step closer to finding that girl. Start spending time outside and meet new people. Have a conversation with someone. Just say “It’s nice today, isn’t it?” simple as that, and see how you will feel.
6. Be a role model
Don’t be a class clown, because if you are not serious in class, then how can someone take you seriously in life? No girl will want to spend time with a class clown. Instead, become a role model. Stand tall, walk nicely, speak humbly, and share gently.
You’re in high school, be somebody. A girl wants someone who is a nice person, who is a person acceptable in society. Don’t do wrong things, but do what is right. And a girl will soon be interested in dating you.
When you’re in high school, there are plenty of options for you to choose from. Join sports teams. A football team or basketball team. Girls love athletic guys. Or wear clothes that define you and make you unique. Girls love guys like that who have a dressing sense.
Learn and understand body language because it’s important to let a girl know about your intentions. Actions speak louder than words anyway, so don’t forget these few tips. They will surely help you stand out in high school and make new, great friends.
Being Yourself is Important
You can ask as many girls as you want, and they will answer you the same. They want things that are real. That is why you should always be yourself if you are considering dating a girl from high school. If you just want to get a date by lying to girls, then it won’t be a good thing at all. Girls will not be interested in any of that. They don’t like guys who pretend to be someone else or act like others. Just be yourself and not try to copy others just to get a date.
Let’s take an example here. You are the IT type of guy who loves computers, science, gadgets, and nerdy things. But girls are more interested in the guys who do sports, dress well, etc. Now you want to become those guys instead of being yourself, and that will create a problem. It’s not who you are, which is why the girls that you will attract will not share similarities with you. You can play the pretend game for a long time, but when the reality finally shows, the girl will simply stop being in a romantic relationship with you.
This is not how to get a girlfriend in high school. When you pretend to be someone else, soon she will realize you’re not her type. She’s special in her way and you’re special on your own. But if the relationship is based on lies and pretend, well, then it will fall apart soon. And that is when your self-esteem will take a massive blow. You shouldn’t look for reasons girls don’t like you. Just be yourself, be unique and you will find the perfect girl for you.
So, be a gentleman. Never alter your personality just to gain a date with someone. Be kind, hold the door open for her, and take care of her. Don’t feed her lies about what you like. Instead, tell her the truth about who you are. If you love IT, tell her that. If you love sports, tell her that too. A relationship is made with trust and is strengthened by the truth. When you are being yourself, the right girl will find you as well. They will be into you because you are what they want, a truthful, honest, and a lovely guy with the same likes.
Don’t Get Stuck on Just One Girl
One thing that you should remember is to never get stuck on just one girl. You might get a crush in high school and probably make eye contact with her too, but it doesn’t mean she will feel the same way about you. If you are too focused on one girl, you might miss the chance to meet an ideal girl who has the same interests and hobbies as you. In high school, look for girls that are compatible with you. Not just because you like her, but you should look deep and find the right one. You should find a girl that matches your personality.
Now, high school is a big place. There are plenty of girls there and you might get more than a crush there. It’s normal for guys your age to have a crush on different girls. By talking to different girls, you are creating options for yourself and increasing your social skills.
Even if they’re not looking for a romantic relationship with you, you can still be friends with those girls. Talk and gain more experience to up your game. You have to be social to get a girlfriend in high school.
If you limit yourself to just one girl, then the person you are looking for might not be available to you in the future. Because your eyes are glued on one person, one girl. You should meet and talk with more girls to find the right one for you.
Someone who you can introduce to your family and friends. A person who respects you and your family. Someone who shows an interest in you and your personality. Having a crush in high school is normal, but limiting yourself can be a problem. So don’t be hung up on just one crush, instead be adventurous.
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5 tips that might help you avoid the friend zone (Be Friendly, or Even Flirty)
If you like someone in high school, one thing you should fear, is, “The Friend Zone” Now it’s not rocket science to how to avoid that, but you should still be wary of it. One piece of advice I would give you is to be extra friendly and flirty with a girl so she can get a hint of your perception of hers. Make your intentions clear and if you still have a problem with that.
1. Give her a hint
A good way to let a girl know about your feelings for her is to be always near her. Give her hints so she can know about your intentions. For example, ask your friends where she is if you don’t see her in the class. When she comes back, her friends will tell her you were looking for her. Look for her during lunch too.
That will mean you want to share your free time with her instead of with your friends. Chat with her near her locker when class is over. By giving her your company more, she will get a hint of your feelings and might understand that you like her.
The more you will be around her, the more she will realize soon. Sometimes, you can’t say things directly, which is why giving her your company is a good way of telling your feelings. When she sees your face all the time in high school, soon she will get the hint.
And that’s when you can ask her out when you give her all the hints. Be friendly, and flirty, and spend time with her. She will love you for it. That’s my advice.
2. Put a smile on her face
Girls love it when a guy can make them laugh. And to be honest, they even choose a life partner who is funny because no one wants to be with a gloomy guy. We all talked about how girls love to talk. And if you can talk and make her laugh too, well, the girls will be head over heels for you.
They are very attracted to guys who can put a smile on their faces. Laughter is a great medicine to relieve stress and anxiety and helps forget problems, too. High school can be a serious place, but a joke from you can brighten up someone’s day.
By making her laugh, she will feel more comfortable around you and will want to spend time with you. It’s such a simple thing to do, but it means a lot to girls. She won’t show interest in guys who give her expensive gifts or take her out in their car, no.
But a simple person, who can make her laugh and smile, will surely catch her attention compared to others. Remember my advice: the way to a girl’s heart is through her ears. Melt it with your words and keep her smiling. You will get a girlfriend from high school in no time.
3. Compliment her
You can let girls know you like them by complimenting them. All girls want to hear good things about themselves. And it would only take you seconds to compliment them. It can be anything. Compliment on her dress, eyes, hair, hands, make-up, style, or personality.
Anything that you genuinely like about her, let her know. Tell her she looks beautiful today. Tell her the way she walks makes your heart jump up and down. Let her know she has angelic eyes, a beautiful face, an attractive smile, etc. Girls love hearing all of those.
When you say something nice about her, like about her perfume or dress, maybe. She gets confidence and appreciates you for noticing it. The more you compliment her, the more she will show interest in you. It’s natural for girls to like guys who compliment them all the time. It’s a nice thing to do anyway because they deserve to know how cute they look every day. So complimenting her is a good way to not just be her friend in high school.
4. Body language is important
When you cannot convey your feelings through words, then you can use another language to convey them. Body language is a very important part of socializing. But since you are in high school, remember to never touch someone without their permission.
It is morally and ethically unacceptable behavior. Some touching can be good for conveying your feelings, like holding her hands when you walk, playing games in high school when she laughs and you touch her shoulder, etc. These are okay, but aggressive touching is something you should never do. Girls don’t like that.
You can give her a harmless nudge with your arm or shoulder, or a brush against her arm. That’s all fine, but never, and I mean never cross boundaries. Always respect girls’ boundaries because your intentions might be harmless, but it won’t feel the same way for girls.
Learn to read the body language of girls. What does touch mean to her? What kind of touching does she like and what does she dislike? You should know all these answers. Light touching is okay, but anything beyond that might give off the wrong impression of you. Remember that.
5. Share your feelings
The easiest way is to just let her know about your feelings and intentions. Tell her directly how you like her and be thorough. Leave nothing out. It’s a chance, so don’t waste it. Girls like guys who are open and can share feelings easily. In high school, it might be difficult for you to express your feelings directly, it’s fine. Just don’t lose focus on what is important. If you don’t share your feelings, she will find someone else. Letting her know you like her will give you an honest answer in return.
If you share your feelings, you might turn that friendship into a relationship. Who knows, she likes you too and is just waiting for you to say something? Think about it.
In Closing, Ask Her Out
With all the tips and advice that we shared with you on how to get a girlfriend in high school, it’s time to seal the deal. If you have already found a girl that you like, it’s time to ask her out on a date. Being hesitant about asking her out and don’t know how to, here are some nice tips for you that will be the icebreaker.
If you have spent some time with her, you might know a lot about her by now. It can be difficult for you at first to ask her out, but it might become easy because you know how she is. What she likes and what she doesn’t. It will help you in asking her out. Maybe ask her out on a special occasion like a birthday or any school event. It will be a successful date when special things are involved.
The best date is when you take her to a place that you both like or love. Where you can be happy and comfortable. Make her laugh and smile. Make her feel loved and appreciated. You might choose a date when you can be alone. Create lovely moments with her and make the date a very memorable day for her.
And remember, respect her boundaries. Don’t touch her if she is uncomfortable. Be respectful. And your date will appreciate it. If you want more dates with her, be nice. Remember the tips, apply them, and ask her out in the end. That’s how you get a girlfriend in high school.
Ruth Jesse
Ruth is a life coach who specialises in relationships and career development. Outside work, she loves writing novels and guides for personal development.