For a lot of people, Tinder dating is one of the best things that ever happened. There, they can meet a lot of potential partners who can get into a relationship with them. While some are successful, others aren’t.
So, you’ve downloaded the app and placed a 10/10 selfie as your profile photo. You giggled to yourself at your clever bio. Now, should you begin swiping?
A big “No”.
You ask why?
– Oh hell no, he’s from the Valleys.
– His chest is SO hairy!
– He’s got a dog- way too big of a commitment.
– He’s a farmer. I’m not ready to be shoveling shit at 5 am.
– Why on earth is he using the butterfly Snapchat filter?
– 5’8″? Nope, he’s vertically challenged.
– Why is it ALWAYS the ugly one in a group photo?
– Okay, he’s interested in Politics, History, and Sociology. I feel like he’s far too intelligent for me.
– Ugh! He’s actually pouting!
– Is he seriously doing that pose? I don’t know if that’s supposed to be a joke.
And here’s more:
– Swearing at the camera. Charming!
– His sunglasses are actually offensive to my eyes. Ew!
– 19 is a bit TOO young, although he is fit.
– No hair. Pass.
– Why is he carrying one of those fake Gucci shoulder bags? The worst creation I’ve ever seen.
– ‘My 3-year-old boy is my world’. Oh, no. I’m not ready for that kind of commitment.
– Ooh, this guy? Fit- not.
So, why are women so shallow on Tinder? People can’t stop judging each other there.
The Real Deal with Tinder
Tinder is a genius app if you’re self-obsessed and if you enjoy rating people like you’re Tyra Banks from America’s Next Top Model. Unfortunately, not everyone you’ll see in that app can pass your standards.
There’s a good chance you could be swiping 32-year old, Carlsberg-swigging Neil who works in the garage and frequents students’ house parties because he’s not ready to grow up.
And you know what?
There are quite a few Neils in the Tinder world. In fact, I have dated a few of them.
Tinder dating unleashes a whole new world that I wasn’t definitely ready for…
1. Dating a 33-year old guy who lived at home and sent me photos of which cardi he should wear for work.
2. Going for pizza with a roid head who had a secret fetish of pulling on my double chin. I genuinely wish this was a lie.
3. Being taken to the cinema and my date falling asleep on me halfway through Crimson Peak. I really liked that film, you know.
4. Being sent a wrong text message basically saying that I was one of four he was dating. When asked what number I was, he said two. Damn.
5. During university, I actually considered letting Darren come around and massage my feet for £100.
So, does Tinder work?
I am sure that you can get a few dates (with Neil) there or maybe free food. However, I really don’t think Tinder is the one for marriage.
Well, it didn’t work for me. Although I did have a giggle at Neil 1, 2 and 3, I feared that when I am 30 years old, I’ll be sitting on my sofa watching Bridget Jones and convincing myself that Neil from Cardiff would look okay- if he shaved his sideburns & stopped wearing socks with his Jesus sandals.
Swipe you later girls and guys!